26.12.07

25 Things I Learned in College

1. If you want to date one of your bloc mates, think twice before you even make a move.

2. Marriage and the Family is the most depressing subject in the universe.

3. Land Reform and Taxation is second.

4. Don’t argue with people who are a lot older than you. It’s not that you might be wrong, just don’t. Save your energy for something more productive.

5. For some people, the number achievement that you put in resumé is inversely proportional to the number of character references.

6. Talent is an advantage in the student council elections. I repeat—talent.

7. If ever you’re dating your thesis partner, never, under any circumstances, break up with him or her in the middle of the school year. Trust me on this one.

8. Some professors will appreciate it if you recite and get good grades in your quizzes; others prefer a cake from Red Ribbon.

9. The blogosphere is not a safe place to pour in your rantings.

10. What is wrong with the world? Nobody wants to find solutions.

11. Join as much organizations as you want during your freshman and sophomore years. Enjoy your free time while you still have them.

12. If you have something to say about the faculty or the administration don’t post it on the freedom board. Instead, write it on your desk. A lot of people would read it, and it will not hinder you from getting a diploma.

13. Avoid that fire extinguisher inside the AB organization room.

14. If you think that your professor is gay, don’t tell anyone until you’re sure. You might be wrong.

15. When you cheat on an exam, do it with finesse.

16. Live a clean and healthy lifestyle. Sex, drugs, and rock ‘n roll is overrated.

17. Sad reality: “Talo ng masipag ang magaling.”

18. Tuition increase is an inevitable phenomenon in the universe.

19. Community service feels good, if you’re normal.

20. A good grasp of algebra might save your life someday.

21. If you’re friends with the campus guards, you’re already untouchable.

22. It pays to bring an umbrella everyday.

23. Take a personality test in the guidance office at least one. You will really appreciate it.

24. What is a bad girlfriend? It is anything that occupies personal space and has weight.

25. You only have four years to actually contribute to society as a part of the academe (unless, of course, you peruse graduate studies or you decide to teach). Do what you can while you still have time to do it.

16.11.07

Who said that there are no Shortcuts in Life?

Who said that there are no Shortcuts in Life

This is the Philippines, you can cut the cost of everything: A digital camera usually costing around eight to ten thousand pesos can be bought here at a very low price of three thousand pesos, and sometimes even lower. It’s just a matter knowing where to look. Here, you don’t need to be filthy rich to buy a camera, nor do you need huge amounts of money for a cellphone. You don’t even need to do research for your thesis; neither do you need to do a thesis to get a grade. You don’t need to get married to have marriage contract; learn how to drive to get a license; and if four years is too long for you—you don’t even need to attend a single class to get yourself a diploma. We always find a way to make life easy for us. I’m not saying that this is something that we should be proud of. My point is, in reality they exist—and we are letting them because we want them there just in case we need them. We always want to find the quickest way out. Even if it involves cutting the process short, or scrap it totally.


Why bother spending mountains of cash for education. The only thing you want in the end is a mealy piece of paper you call a diploma. And if you go to places like Recto, you will learn that 1000 pesos is a small price to pay for a document verifying four years of college education. “It’s just like the real thing,” said a woman who wants to be addressed only with the alias Aling Lucy. “No one will suspect the difference. Only a handful can tell that it’s fake.”


Aling Lucy used to peddle bananacues and rice cakes on V. Mapa, earning four to five hundred pesos per day. Life was really hard for her then—living out of an amount barely enough to pay the rent. Three years ago, a friend tagged her along to join her business in Recto: selling unauthentic documents such as marriage contracts, transcripts of records, diplomas, certifications of employment, and even school ID’s and driver’s license. “It’s illegal,” she said “But it brings dinner to the table.” Now, she earns around 500 to 1000 pesos a day, not bad according to her.


She sits on a high chair facing a table with documents laminated on all over it. She would list down on her notebook, her customers’ name and what they want. The customer is then asked to return and claim whatever it is he/she ordered. The order is then sent to a place she called “the house.” According to her, the house is heart of the operation. It is where the layout and printing is taken place. Aling Lucy has no hands on the layout. She’s just there to take orders from customers. There are people in the house tasked to do the technical stuff. The house takes 50 percent of income.


Sometimes students would come to us asking us make receipts for their enrolment. We would add around 1000 to 2000 pesos to total amount in the receipt. We would ask them to pay only 200 to 150 pesos. So they would earn more than a thousand bucks from their parents.”


The output is very realistic. If there would be anything dubious about their products, Aling Lucy said that it’s only the color and signature.


Yes, her business is illegal but nobody seems to care. All of her operations are done in broad daylight, at plain sight of everyone on the street. She would open her stand at nine in the morning and close at five. Even police officers rarely mind setup. There would be raids from time to time, which set the whole street to panic state. But even the law is not something money can’t buy. “Police raids would often send the people here running, but they are easy to get rid of. Two hundred to five hundred pesos are enough to buy off the officials,” Aling Lucy said. “The pay offs depend on the rank of the officer,” she added. Three hundred is already too much for a rooky, but sometime 2000 pesos is not enough for a police chief. Nonetheless, Aling Lucy said that it is still a price to considering how she gets from her business at the end of the year.


Prices of her items range 200 to 3000 pesos. Grade sheets usually cost 200 pesos, and a diploma costs around 1000 pesos to 3000 pesos, depending on the prestige of the school. Aling Lucy said that the computerization of the schools is making her job a lot easier. Transcripts are now easier to fake. The process of replication is now faster because of new technology.


In some days, she would be able to entice 25 customers. But more often, three to five are all that the day can offer. It’s a tough job. Everyday she puts her life on the line, but who can blame her—it’s easy money. Besides, the world is tolerating her existence. Basic economics: the supply wouldn’t be there if the demand is not.

15.11.07

World Domination

Check this out:

poquiz.net

This could mean only one thing: I am not alone.

5.11.07

Extra-Dimensional Force: The Consciousness

I can't sleep so forgive for this madness.

The Physicist Freeman Dyson said “The more I examine the Universe and the details of its architecture, the more evidence I find that the Universe is, in some sense, must have known we were coming
.” This one the freakiest thing I've ever heard. And I'm beggining to think that he's right. I'm not going to talk about God or anything in the same level, rather I realize that whatever it is that we assume to be him, could be just an element of the physical world, which we cannot experience in full.

Scientist think that we live in higher dimensional world. They say that it's possible that the other dimensions (apart from the three or four that we know about) have collapsed into something that is really really small. Kind of like a dwarf sister of the big world that we live in. Now what if, these dimensions aren't really beyond our world but we face them every day, we just cant experience them. Experience requires the consciousness to acknowledge the presence of an object. If out mind is limited to process only those with three dimensions then even if we are faced with something that is extra-dimensional, then we wouldn't know about its existence. Snakes couldn't know about the existence of sound because they don't have ears, therefore they can't experience it. Maybe for us it's the same. We can't know about higher dimensions because we are not equipped with the right physiology to experience it. Maybe it's not about the absence of sensation, but it could be that our minds just can't process it.

Plato said in his allegory of the cave that it is possible to experience a higher form of reality. You could go out of the cave (the reality which you are familiar of) for a certain period of time, make an observation, go back to the cave, tell the people what you saw, and make fool out of yourself. How can this be possible if our perception is only limited to three dimensions? Maybe the answer lies withing the nature of consciousness itself. I have theory that the mind is an extra-dimensional force that is necessary in the universe. Say what? I mean that the human consciousness is a part of this interaction of forces, and that the reason why the universe seem to be tailor-made for man is because man's cognizance is a necessary force in the universe.

Quantum theory says the existence and properties of all objects are dependent on an observer acknowledging the presence (or properties) of that object. The position of a particular particle depends on how a scientist with very huge microscopes (google the uncertainty principle of quantum mechanics) would measure it. Man needs to be in the universe to observe the universe. And everything, like the sun, oxygen, water, were placed in the world so that it could be hospitable for an observer. What's worrying is that the universe is like providing man with the predicaments so that it would have sense of what to observe. It could be argued that the purpose of the earth revolving around the sun, the moon revolving around the earth, the earth spinning, and the earth being tilted, is to give us a sense time. Day and night gives us the idea that moments pass by, and the seasons give us an awareness of cycles, and so on. We are now able to observe a fourth dimension (time) through its manifestations.

I'm not really sure if I'm making sense right now. Well, at least I got it out of my system.

4.11.07

The Choice of Sisyphus

There's something that's been bothering me for the past few months. It's the guy named Sisyphus. If you already know the story skip the preceding sentences and jump to the next paragraph, but for those who don't, carry on. In Greek mythology, he was the Smart Alek who made a mockery out of Hades several time (just google the details). Sisyphus was convicted of “crimes against the gods” and was condemned to eternal labor. His punishment was to push a boulder up a mountain, and whenever he would come close to the top, the boulder would slip his grasps and the damn thing would come rolling down again. Talk about eternal frustration.


Here's the thing that's bothering me: what if Sisyphus suddenly decides not to push the boulder any more? I mean, would it make a difference? Would there be a punishment if ever he fails to comply with the first punishment? What could be could be worse than being frustrated for eternity? If you ask me, I would rather suffer the pain of having my liver eaten every day. Mythology never said that he was bound not choose otherwise.


Maybe there is no punishment,” a friend told me. “Once Sisyphus stops, he would have nothing to do. He would get board, then he would push the boulder back up again, just for the heck of it.” We were drink near the takeout counter of some hotel in Tomas Morato when we had that conversation. I don't think he was already drunk when he said that. But maybe he does have a point. Maybe eternal boredom is a far worse punishment than frustration.

22.8.07

How to Become a Filipino Superhero
The Easy Way

For those of you who were born without superpowers, I tell you, it’s easy. All you need is a good heart, a chaotic society, and a cosmic entity from space to grant you amazing abilities. Mars Ravelo, one of the most popular comic book creator in the archipelago, made the formula as idiot friendly as possible. This guide will discuss comprehensively, all the essential elements of superhuman crime fighting using the two most popular creations of Ravelo namely, Darna and Captain Barbell, as references.

1. Wait for a cosmic entity. Probably the most important element in becoming a superhero is superpowers. It is also the most desired. Everybody wants to fly. Everybody wants to read minds. Everybody wants superhuman strength so that you can beat the hell out that old professor of yours who flunked you in your chemistry class in high school.


Bad luck to most us, because superpowers can never be generated on this earth. When I say not on this earth, I mean not something science can produce or explain. If you observe carefully the superheroes of mainstream, western comic books such as DC and Marvel, you would notice that almost all sources of superhuman abilities in their fantasy world are grounded on science, one way or the other. Spiderman’s high-jumping, web-slinging, fast-moving fetes were all caused by a radioactive-spider bite. The unstable molecular structure of the spider’s venom caused the teenager’s DNA to undergo genetic transformation. The X-Men were all unfortunate victims of mutation, a common occurrence in nature, wherein an offspring acquires traits that are not physically dominant in both parents. Superman is complex being from the planet Krypton, whose genetic structure allows him to use our sun’s light to grant him enhanced ability’s (like a human solar panel).


Darna, the earliest creation among the two, was granted super abilities, by a white stone that fell from space. Narda, the mortal identity of Darna, had to swallow the rock and shout the magic word in order for her to transform into the super-heroine.


When the Narda first appeared in Bulaklak Magazine, Volume 4, #17 she had to shout a different name. Before, the name of the superwoman that emerged after swallowing the stone was Varga. The story line was basically the same. Ravelo had issues with the editors of Bulaklak and resigned form the publication, said the comic book creator’s daughter Rita Ravelo-Dela Cruz in an interview. After quitting from the magazine, Ravelo signed-up with Pilipino Komiks where he released, for the first time, Darna, as we know her today in Pilipino Komiks # 77. In contras with some notions regarding the name of the character, Dela Cruz said that the name “Darna” didn’t came from the popular children’s story “Ibong Adarna.” It is only Narda spelled backwards. According to Dela Cruz, Ravelo got the name from his childhood playmate Leonarda.


Captain Barbell has a more mystifying origin of superpowers. In the original comic version and the 1965 movie (played by Herbert Bautista and Edu Monsano), Teng-Teng, a skinny, kind hearted member of the lower class, was given a barbell by an old hermit. The hermit was a mysterious man who was never identified in both the comics and in the movie. Teng had to lift the barbell and shout “Captain Barbell” in order to transform into the muscular champion.


In the 2003 movie played by Ogie Alcasid (Teng) and Bong Revilla (Capt. Barbell), the barbell came from space (like Darna’s white stone). It crash landed to earth and was buried underground for centuries waiting for the right person to pick it up.


In the two series, the devices which granted the characters superpowers were magical. No logic could explain the origin of both the white stone and the barbell. Magic became an easy escape route for Ravelo.


GMA Networks tried to tie the logical lose ends of the Ravelo characters. The modern adaptations CB gave the storyline a dose of science fiction. In the 2005 television series, Potencion Magtanggol or Teng, played by Richard Gutierrez, is a superhuman mutant form the future. He was sent to the past to escape the clutches of the evil General. Likewise, the barbell too came from the future, but unlike the device given by the hermit in earlier versions, it contained no magic. The barbell is more of a medallion made out of a special element called Barbanium. The element is a form of radioactive metallic substance that could enhance the abilities of normal human beings.


Teng in the TV series already posses super abilities because his bones are complete made out of Barbanium. There is a scene in the first episode, where six-year-old Teng lifted a tractor (just like the young Kal-El in the first movie of Superman) without the barbell being anywhere near him. But this doesn’t mean that he doesn’t need the barbell anything more than costume change. For some reason, his powers are limited. He tends to become weak after using his abilities. The barbell, in this case, serves as a battery, allowing the young crime fighter to use his powers without the fear of his muscles turning into jelly.


2. Have a good heart. Motivation is overrated. If Peter Parker’s uncle didn’t die of a mugging incident, then Spiderman probably wouldn’t be web slinging in any part of Manhattan. Instead, maybe he found a career in wrestling. If Bruce Wayne’s parents weren’t shot by thugs, then the millionaire probably grew up as some middle-aged gambling lord. The characters by Ravelo never had these kinds of motivations. The only driving forced they had was a kind heart that and the willingness to save the word.


Both the barbell and white stone had a mind of its own. Both chooses its own barer. The qualification was simple: the heart of the person who yields it must be pure. In CB, the barbell can never be lifted with people with evil intentions. The white stone, likewise, can never be used by people with a mischievous mind.


3. Keep your identity a secret. Just like what Elastagirl said in the Disney movie The Incredibles, “Protect your secret identity as if it was your most prized possession.” I can only think only of one superhero team whose identities are open to the public they serve, and they’re the Fantastic Four of Marvel Comics. The rest of them seem to treat privacy as if it was money.


The whole crime fighting business is all centered on the Judeo-Christian virtue of charity. Or, if you want to be philosophical, you might consider classifying their actions under Emmanuel Kant’s Categorical Imperative. There is a need for a costume.


Superheroes from the west needed create their costumes after they get their superpowers. It’s a separate package. It could be a burden sometimes. When ever there’s villain attacking the town, they would have to go through the trouble of finding secure place for them to make an instant dress-up. Some of found some clever of ways of pulling off the quick costume change. For example, Spiderman wears his spider costume inside his shirt. He only needs to loose the coat put on some gloves and a mask, and then he’s ready for action. Superman’s gimmick is slightly similar but a lot easier. Like Spidey, he wears his costume inside his shirt. The only difference is, he doesn’t need wear a mask. He just takes off his glass, changes his hairstyle, and the Kryptonian is set to fly.


Those costume changes only takes time. When you’re a Pinoy superhero, you would know that every second counts. In both Darna and CB, the costume goes with the superpower. When Narda swallows the white stone, she instantly transform into the superwoman, costume and all.


The case is similar with CB. However, in this case, there is more to his transformation than just dress up. When Teng uses the barbell, he transforms into a different person. The thin and petite young man will change into a tall and masculine champion, after shouting the magic word. In the movie version, aside from the guy doing Teng, there would be a separate actor who would play the role of CB. The Teng played by Herbert Bautista transform into Edu Monsano, after lifting the barbell. Ogie Alcasid’s Teng transforms into Bong Revilla.


But this change in character doesn’t happen in the TV series. The GMA version is the first incarnation of CB wherein the actor playing Teng and CB is the same. When Richard Gutierrez lifts the barbell, there would only be a change in costume. The transformation resembles that of Darna. The fact that Gutierrez lifts the barbell with his left arm could justify this event. In the Herbert Bautista movie, using your left hand to lift the barbell will neither change your appearance nor will it give you special abilities. But this raises the question, If Richard Gutierrez lifts the barbell with his right arm, will he transform into a more masculine character? The series never cleared this out.


4. Avoid your antithesis. Bullets, lasers, and atomic weapons beware. Filipino superheroes rarely have weakness. Unlike Superman, who folds at sight of Kryptonite, a Filipino superhero is invulnerable to almost anything. At least, in superhero mode they are.


Western superheroes usually live their lives hand in hand with their superpowers. Every time they go to the mall to buy food, or go class, or to their day jobs, they know that they are safeguarded by their abilities. A love interest is usually inserted in the plot to give the foreign character a weak point. The emotions, or the “human side,” become the accustomed target for their villains. In Ravelo’s world, the human side is literally the human form. Since Darna and CB are entirely dependent on the stone and the barbell, the time that they turn back into their alter egos becomes a moment of vulnerability for both characters. Whenever Narda goes to the market without the stone, she does that on her own. In some episodes, the villain would usually get the chance to create havoc during the time when the stone is not available.


This is a common dialogue for Narda: “Sinusugod ng halimaw ang bayan. Hala naiwan ko yung bato sa bahay. Paano na yan?” Narada would hurry back home to get to the stone but the time she gets there, half the town would have been razed. Sometimes, a friend would come in the nick of time to hand Narda the stone. Kind of like a buzzer beater. All is saved in the last minute.


The television series of CB added a little twist to the nature of barbells power. Unlike the one in the original comic book, CB here has a weakness. The powers granted by Barnium are not absolute. It can contrasted by another element call “Askobar” short for “Asido Kontra Barnanium.” The so called chemical is usually in liquid form, but can be crystallized to form an opaque, purple rock, which glows whenever CB would come near it. At a certain radius from the rock, the hero becomes completely vulnerable. His body will also excruciate with pain, making him unable to stand up, or do anything for that matter.


5. Know your foreign inspiration. You can argue all you want but Darna will always be better than Wonder Woman. Dela Cruz claimed that Ravelo never really patterned the Pinoy heroine to hard kicking Amazon. She said the Ravelo wanted to create a female Superman, that’s why he created Darna. During the 1950’s US soldiers brought to the Philippines comic book series such as Superman and Captain Marvel. These characters inspired Ravelo to create a superhero of his own.


When Darna first came out, she can already fly. The Wonder Woman of the 1950’s only possessed superhuman strength and the ability to leap huge distances. Darna, also, never blocked bullets with her armband like Wonder Woman. In the original comic version, she was completely invulnerable. Bullets bounce off her chest like the stunt of superman. It was only until the 1970’s version (played by Vilma Santos), that the arm shielding stunt was executed by the Filipino superwoman.


It’s not really that hard to guess as to who inspired Ravelo to create CB. Captain Marvel of DC comics never really got as popular as Superman here in the Philippines, but the character he influence was sold here like hotcakes. For those of you who don’t know CM, he comic book character who first appeared Whiz Comics #2 during the 1940s. The characteristics of this super-powered champion are similar to that of Superman’s. He has the ability to fly at super-sonic speed, lift huge weights without breaking a sweat, he’s invulnerable to anything. But unlike the popular Kryptonian, CM doesn’t need a costume change. His alter ego, Billy Batson, is young boy who was granted special powers by an old hermit. All the kid needs to do is to shout the word “Shazam” then a lightning bolt will transform him into a tall, masculine, adult, with super powers.


The similarities between Captain Barbell and Captain Marvel will give you the impression that without a doubt, CB was a rip off of CM. But of course you already had that idea when you took note of the homonymy of their names.


***

Just follow the above mentioned and you’ll find yourself in the super-powered crime-fighting business in no time. Ravelo’s formula is simple. In fact it’s so simple, that anyone can become superhero, or a superhero creator, with so little effort.

21.8.07

Yeah

Nothing can ruin this day! Nothing! =)

4.8.07

Waking up is hard to do

Damn it. I want to be nocturnal again. I’m always so freaking tired at the end of the day. I’m not use to this. Want to feel the joy of staying up the whole night, knowing that half the world is already asleep. I don’t even know why I’m like this now. Maybe it’s the senior stress. Maybe it’s the lack of exercise. Maybe it’s the absence of someone who left me for a reason. I don’t really know.

The other day I dozed of really early. I did that on purpose. You see, I can’t really write anything when there are people around me. The living room is not really the ideal place for our computer if you ask me. I had to write this paper for my Ethics class. I know that I can't type a single paragraph knowing that my family members are all around me, awake and living their lives. I usually wait for all them to go to bed until I go down, slither quietly to the computer, and do my thing. But was I was so freaking puffed out. It was only 9 pm and I’m still 600 words away from my paper to be passed at 8 am the following day. I know I had to do something. I know my limitation and I know I can’t force my self to do the paper now or to try and stay awake. I took a very extreme risk. I slept. I set my alarm at 2:30 am so I had 5 and a half hour to finish the paper.

My alarm went off. Waking up was a struggle. Dawn comforts me like a soft pillow and a nice blanket. I know I need to get up. I went straight to the bath room and stung myself with a cold shower. I took a walk afterwards just to keep myself up. I never expected it to be my best walk ever. Manila seems different two hours before half of its population wakes up.

(to be continued)

19.7.07

I got this from the past

You Should Be a Science Fiction Writer

Your ideas are very strange, and people often wonder what planet you're from.
And while you may have some problems being "normal," you'll have no problems writing sci-fi.
Whether it's epic films, important novels, or vivid comics...
Your own little universe could leave an important mark on the world!

Cock-sucking idiot

Why do you want read about my life? Maybe you're hopping that I would write about something more profound and interesting. Maybe you’re expecting me to review a book, a movie, or a CD. Do you want me to crack a joke? We’ll you aint gonna get none of that fagot. Yeah I’m talking to you. You, who read people’s blogs for pleasure. You, who have nothing anything better to do but sit in front of that damn box of yours. Damn it! Why are you still reading?

15.7.07

I'm Hungry

I can’t listen to my music player anymore. My nights are quite. It’s the type of quietness that I can’t stand. You know, the one where you hear some sort buzzing noise coming from all direction. I want to read something just to escape anxiety, but my mind is too clouded to comprehend anything. I want to go out to the streets and just scream. I want to stick my head inside a machine. Eat until I’m full enough to explode.

6.6.07

Now that that's over

Now that felt really good! Seeing my last post on screen gave me this “happy” sensation. I’ve been depressed these past few weeks. Probably because of the lack of output. I haven’t written anything good in the last three months. I realized that just recently and thinking about it stings. I was thinking that blogging would be a good exercise. It could help me keep my neurons in shape. Plus, I need an avenue where I can share my useless insights. I hope that this would be a great conversation between the two of us.

First the Excuse

Here’s the thing. I don’t really like it when somebody comes to me asking “Bakit hindi mo ina-update yung blog mo?” Yeah, the idea that people actually take time to read the crap that I write is flattering (like a bulldozer), but every time someone asks, it makes me think about how lazy I am. The truth sucks. So, just for future reference I came up with this: thirty reasons why my last post is still X-months-old.

Things I would rather do than to update my blog

1. Read other people’s blog
2. Chat on the phone
3. Do my thesis
4. SMS my ex-girlfriend
5. Wait for a reply (which never comes) from my ex-girlfriend
6. Stalk people on Friendster
7. Window shop
8. take a walk
9. watch porn
10. buy old magazines
11. drink liquid nitrogen
12. read
13. watch TV
14. buy DVDs
15. watch DVDs
16. come up with racist jokes (black humor)
17. come up with sexist jokes (pink humor)
18. brush my teeth
19. eat
20. watch porn
21. listen to the radio
22. chat on the net
23. scratch my balls
24. cook pasta
25. eat pasta
26. pick my nose
27. sleep
28. read the newspaper
29. clean my room
30. wash the dishes

I could go on forever but choose not to exaggerate.